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« As it Happens, if You Like Your Drum Major, You DO Get to Keep Your Drum Major | Main | For Thine Is the Kingdom and the Lemon-Lime Fruit Fizzer »
Monday
May092011

Getting Full Value on My Free Admission to Drum Major Tryouts

Tomorrow is Drum Major tryouts.  I will be there, of course.  Puking.  In a purely supportive manner. 

Kentucky Derby coverage, day job crap, SuperAunting, and general confusion and delay have prevented me from posting more about Spring Game and the aftermath... but it's on the way.  For the moment, I promise I'll let you know the results of the tryouts as soon as they're announced. That will be a short flare fired from the window of The Millennium Bellemobile; another post, possibly in liveblog format, will follow after I'm done vomiting.  Because I am rooting for EVERYBODY.  TOTALLY EQUALLY.

Ten candidates are trying out, which is an enormous number.  Jason is defending his title and Matt The Badass has quite emphatically retired, which means I've been watching quite the confidence scrum at practices over the past few days.  They'll be judged on musicality, baton control, strutting, and ability to assassinate international terrorists with a single ground bounce while the Navy SEALS take the credit. 

When the numbers come down, the top candidate is the 2011 Drum Major.  Second place is the Assistant.  Period.  No ampersands, commas, upside-down question marks or do-overs allowed.

They'll perform the ramp entrance and backbend with which we've all become so familiar, a series of high tosses (no music, just the whirl of the baton and the deafening roar of your own self-aggrandizement), and a musical performance, backed by the A-Band.  This year's selection is "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy."  Which we will hear ten times. Vanilla Ice just emailed all, "Aren't you putting a bit too much emphasis on one single song?"

Judges include high school band directors, the 2010 Most Inspirational Bandsman, and former Drum Majors... one of which is Mr. Joshua The Supposedly Subdued Halter.  If you'd like to influence his vote, you are screwed.  You can try.  (I tried.)  But he will laugh at you and order another Stella, and you will pay for it and thank him for the privilege.

To tide you over, here's a no-drop/drop-dead combo from Jason.  I've been saving it.  Because once you strip away the judges, the drama, the "Hiya!" smiles and the endless music loop... this is the remainder.  And it is joy, and it is work, and it is joy in work. 

This is just a part of Jason.  But it's the essence of one of those parts, and if you, like me, are humbled by it, then you are beginning to understand this book just a little bit. 

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