• DRINK TO THE LASSES: Notes from a Woman's College Womb
    DRINK TO THE LASSES: Notes from a Woman's College Womb
    by Mary Beth Ellis
  • Twentysomething Essays by Twentysomething Writers
    Twentysomething Essays by Twentysomething Writers
    Random House Trade Paperbacks
This area does not yet contain any content.
« Notes From the Back of a Black-Eyed Susan, Edition V: The Baffert Strikes Back | Main | The First Wave of the Long Goodbye »
Friday
May142010

Cookies and Unicorns Were Had

Many thanks to all The Readers, members of the Salida Arts Council, and random drifters (dude,  I saw you and your bandanna skulking around in the back, don't try to hide it) who came to my Colorado Art Ranch presentation today.  If you missed it, two things-- 1) you suck 2) fear not, because it was taped.  And! More good news:  I'm scheduled for two group readings next week.  You have been generously granted additional opportunities to appease my wrath, and I suggest you take advantage.

This isn't the whole smash, because 1) I failed to shut up in a reasonable amount of time and 2) some parts were excised because of a few interruptions and audio problems, the technical term for which, I believe, is "failing to speak directly into the microphone."  But you didn't miss much, just the fat-free sour cream wrestling and the unicorn sighting.  Included are a discussion of Alan Bean's artwork, general space-related crap pulled directly out of my ass,  and readings from The Right Stuff, Carrying the Fire, and Lost Moon.  So I have to warn you that this is very long, and, in many places, very cringey.

Yesterday I was throwing deer heads at the TV because the likes of CNBC were advertising yesterday's launch as end of the entire shuttle program, rather than the (for now) retirement of just Atlantis.  I could not imagine how a certified news organization was fluffing information that a partially drunk English major had within her grasp.  Oh, you silly professional journalists, you.

But karma, she cracks a wicked whip.  One of my major public speaking faults when delivering a program for the first time is the utter inability to complete a thought without "um"ing my way around the world.  Some of the detailed technical information I'm running through here is use-it-or-lose-it, and I haven't used some of this in quite a while, which means my gray matter has ejected it for more vital information, such as the middle name of each individual Kid on the Block.  So although I brushed up as much as possible, while mentally sorting through all this, I "um"ed rather than deliver inaccurate information, and by the time I caught the over-"um"ng, the mid-day meds had worn off, so I just delivered inaccurate information anyway.  Fun for the whole family!

You won't be able to see one of the visuals in the presentation because of the angle of the camera, so it looks like I'm waving a laser pointer at a blank screen, which, given what was coming out of my mouth at this point, was probably just as well.  So when I reference the inside flap of Michael Collins' Carrying the Fire, this is what I mean (click for full size):



Like I said, the file is hideously long, so it's hosted here.  (Feigns 70's hair, whispers) The password is "shuttle."

um at:  mbe@drinktothelasses.com

EmailEmail Article to Friend

Reader Comments (4)

[...] Beth’s “Good Ride, Space Shuttle” presentation is available for viewing.  You don’t get any cookies, though, ’cause you weren’t there. Share and [...]

[...] click here for the latest:  Cookies and Unicorns Were Had [...]

[...] Mary Beth’s Events and Readings ← Cookies and Unicorns Were Had [...]

[...] Beth’s Events and Readings ← The Others Cookies and Unicorns Were Had [...]

Comments for this entry have been disabled. Additional comments may not be added to this entry at this time.