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« You're A Special Bunch of The Readers, You Reached Out, and You Touched a Blonde's Cold, Crystalline Heart | Main | In Which I Throw Myself Upon Your Mercy, And Also Possibly Savings Accounts »

And Now For Something Completely Different, and Hopefully Cheerful

I have been overwhelmed, by many people and for many reasons, by the response from my dear The Readers, and a post is forthcoming.  I am untangling all this in the process of peeling off the rhinestone droppings and tulle bits flung over the continent by the Olympics Crack Figure Skating Special.

But first, a gift to all of you for your donations, your advice, your support, your prayers, and your forwarded emails about prostate health.  In exchange, I offer you the following:  A puppy of your choice, available 24 hours a day, no poop-scooping required. Enjoy.

I plan to make these puppies my crack once my Olympics crack is forcibly ripped from my vein by the Closing Ceremonies.  I keep the window minimized on my desktop, and check in every now and then.  Who's sleeping?  Who's pawing at the squeaky carrot?  Anybody licking anybody else's butt?  These are important questions, increasing in vitalness depending on how little I wish to attend to the task at hand.

Josh The Pilot would like us to have a dog, and I would like us to be able to eat, and also own furniture that doesn't smell like a Port-A-Potty six hours after the conclusion of a  late-August Buffett concert.  When I was a bachelorette, I considered adopting a cat, on the assumption that writers are supposed to like cats.  Cats don't like anybody, and in general writers don't either.

I also went through a finch phase, possibly flashing back to my early childhood, when my parents brought in a parakeet named Smokey.  Smokey was grey and pooped on the curtains.  That was the end of Smokey.  And once I learned that finches don't just shut up when told to, I got a poinsettia.  Which died.

But these puppehs?  They're just right.  Thank you for dogsitting for me when I can't make it to inspect each yelp and scramble.

arf at:  mbe@drinktothelasses.com

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Reader Comments (5)

[...] something completely different, and hopefully more cheerful.  Definitely cuter. Share and [...]

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnd Now… | Morning Works

actually ... try adopting an older dog (like a year or more) - they often come housebroken. We just adopted a 2 year old cocker spaniel from a shelter, who pooped ONCE in the house and never again, and has been the delight of my life for the past month.

February 25, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterstarnarcosis

My first instinct would be to bring in a pound puppy, but Josh grew up with a ridgeback of whom he was very fond. Apparently they only bark when absolutely warranted or something, which... bonus.

February 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMB

I have a 10 year old Shih Tzu named Otis. Otis had to have both his eyes removed a couple years ago and then in May, he went nearly completely deaf. MB, this dog is total love in a 12 pound furry little body! All he wants is to curl up next to a person and just be there. Best thing about a dog is that they don't care if you're overweight or having a bad hair day; they just want to be around you! (Yeah, I LOVE my dog!)

February 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSara N

Aw, the poor thing! He must know how much you love him : )

February 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMB
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