Let's Go to the Zoo, Zoo, Zoo!
Monday, March 23, 2009 at 11:31AM Here's what you want to hear about your nephews:
"How was the zoo today?" I asked Country The Brother-In-Law.
"Oh, well, you know. Will assaulted an alligator."
I used to live in Florida. I knew alligators. Alligators and I were not friends. Will The Smaller Child Nephew had assaulted no alligator. He tried to, apparently; at his Toddlers Meet Wild Rabid Effin' Beast class, or whatever the program is called, the aide removed a baby alligator from his enclosure, Will removed himself from his mother's grasp, and went for the tail. He was thwarted, I am told.
'Tis well. I've got enough crap within crap within other crap without having to come to you people for funds to send my nephew to the One Leg and a Few Chomp Marks Day Camp For Children.
el lagarto at: mbe@drinktothelasses.com
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[...] Monday, March 23rd, 2009 | Uncategorized | morningworksmedia Will The Small Child Nephew pronounces himself a reptile whisperer. Or an average two-year-old within grabbing distance of an alligator. Your choice. Share [...]
Those critters get to live 100+ years old,you know. Having a grudge with such a long-lived animal doesn't sound too wise. You might as well pick a fight with the Sicilian Mafia ;-)
Tell Country to have him wear khakis and practice saying "Crikey!"
You're assuming Will would have LOST.
Yesterday his mother caught him flinging mud-covered pebbles into the toilet, then retrieving them and repeating the process. Like a good youngest (for the moment, anyway), yes, Will would lost.
[...] there’s a simple resolution to such interspecies angst: You send in Will. The Smaller Child Nephew will pull a few tails, everybody will know who’s boss, and there will be cookies for [...]