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The Third

Meet Sam The Newborn Nephew:


You will note his fashionable hat.  Note it well. It's pretty much the closest we'll come to playing dress-up with him for the rest of his life.  "I knew it was a Sam," Uncle Josh The Pilot announced when I told him we had a fourth--fourth--nephew.  Mommy had a long pregnancy and an even longer labor.  She sits gingerly, and Sam, over an inch longer than either of his brothers when they were born, raises furor only when he becomes unswaddled.  That's his biggest problem in life. 

I walked past the Pink Aisle today-- you know the one-- dress-up clothes, Barbie dolls.  The boy aisle contained things like owl puke kits and battery operated rats.  This is the aisle I was forced to stand in to find So Long To Everyone's Attention gifts for Sam's big brothers.

Now that Julie The NephewsMama has hung a "closed" sign on her uterus, the only way I'll see a descendant of ours share the girl's high school we attended is to produce one of my own, and we all know that ain't happening.  In the meantime, my Alumnae Endorsed Application to The Womb grows dusty.

If Sam were a girl, she was to have been named Hannah.  The little face and hair I thought she would have--her mother's-- evaporated the second Sam emerged with the ability to pee standing up.  Missing Hannah, and the appointment we were to have for a Princess Makeover at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique, doesn't mean I love Sam any less.  It just means that I sort through the trucks and cars and perhaps book a Pirate League Experience instead.

I almost took home a car track which hurls a Hot Wheels into the air, through a stream of water, and into a small plastic pool, at which point the car changes color.  This was completely awesome and horribly messy; my sister would have haaaaaaaaaaaaated it, and because I like being in her house, I left it on the shelf.

But I recognized it as fully nephew-focused, which means I might be able to maintain Christmas without plastic Dream Homes.  Just might.

"Let's keep Sam.  I like him," Jim The Child Nephew said as Will The Smaller Child Nephew announced, "I hug and kiss Baby Sam."  We're all getting used to the idea.

has his Mommy's hair anyway at:  mbe@drinktothelasses.com

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Reader Comments (7)

MB - he is so adorably tiny, and well-dressed. Go with the classics, I always say, and you'll never go wrong.
There were 11 granddaughters in our family before a boy made an appearance. That first boy is spoiled, to say the least.
Now I have one granddaughter and one grandson, so the curse has been broken, I think.

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHollee Chadwick

Aww. What a nice way to start the day.

I have two boys -- likely to be my only children -- and I do feel a little pang every time I walk through the doll section of the toystore. My husband, on the other hand, is in heaven looking at the remote controlled whatevers and planning eagerly for the time when he and sons can do Mindstorm (I am not sure I fully understand what that is, to be honest, but do I know it isn't pink).

Congrats to you, Auntie!

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGinny

"(...)and we all know that ain’t happening."

Oh yeah? You know what they say: "You wanna make God laugh? tell Him your plans" ;)

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterred pill junkie

I too have two sons, whom I love dearly and wouldn't trade for anything, but I really wish I could buy frilly dresses and cute little bows and shiny black Mary Jane shoes...

Maybe #3 (a LOOOOOOONG way in the future) will be a girl...

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpraybrethren

What a cutie! Congratulations to all.

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCJ from St. Louis

So glad to see Will is kissing and hugging baby Sam and not punching and hitting him. If it is any consolation when I tried to put my niece in plaid she told me "Aunt Kelly, I am allergic to plaid." (She was 3 and completely refused.) Also, they don't do pink and frilly once they can move on thier own, she was into Brandon's cars as soon as she could scoot across the floor. That whole pink and frilly is really a pipe dream anyway.

October 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKelle Belle

So how will Julie TheNephewsMama guarantee there's no more nephews or nieces? I thought you Catholics are supposed to have as many babies as your organs can produce?

October 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMama_S
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