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Tuesday
Dec092008

HOMELAND SECURITY ALERT

BEWARE OF KRISPY KREME DOUGHNUTS BEARING RED FROSTING.

There was a plate of doughnuts available to the faculty after finals, and I eschewed the crueller, the eclair icinged like a football, the tire-shaped mass of powder.  Instead I reached for a glazed doughnut with cheerful red frosting.  It would be a delicious traditional Krispy Kreme-- with the added goodness of color-infused further sugar.

And when I bit into it?  I got a mouthful of... peppermint.  On a Krispy Kreme.

Listen, I like peppermint, and I like Krispy Kremes, but some lovers are meant to adore from afar, never to marry.  It was the wickedness of the Trojan appetizers wrapped in Christmas frosting, which somehow makes it all the more cruel.

Also!  Apparently, last month, Freelance Switch ran an article the site bought in... July.  Seeing as I was also paid in July, I'm not complaining.  I am merely amused.

trying to put the pieces back together at:  mbe@drinktothelasses.com

tip the bartender

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Reader Comments (4)

Whoa--I consider myself warned. Thank god I happened to stop by by blithely clicking the "next" button at wordpress. Krispy Kreme + peppermint = wrong That I found you is nothing short of kismet. Keep up the good work:)

December 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteronlinepastrychef

Peppermint? That is so wrong. Doughnuts are meant to taste sugary, not minty-fresh. This reminds me of a similar outrage: As a kid, I once got innocuous-looking, fruit -flavored hard candies that were filled with...mayonnaise.

PS--Your FreelanceSwitch link isn't working for me. I can't tell if the problem is on my end or yours, so please double-check the link.

December 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterj.s.

J.S.-- Blame not yourself or your hostess. The problem with with Freelance Switch-- the site has been down for the past 24 hours or so. It should be back up soon. I really appreciate that you went to read the essay :)

December 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMB

[...] blame the Peppermint Doughnut of Doom.  Over the past week, Christmas has become further additions to the daily To Half-Arse List:  [...]

December 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBatman Smells « Blonde C
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